You keep putting off something that you know you absolutely have to deal with. You have already gone through the process once, and it has gone wrong somewhere along the way. It would be better to start over, or that's what you have been advised to do. However, you are afraid that something will go wrong again, and you are nervous about the challenges you will face - but it really isn't going to be as difficult as you think, dear Moonchild. Just get started. Take it step by step. And when you finish, you will have the relief you have also been putting off for all this time!